Fuzzy Math

my brother-in-law told me this story today. he had a lady come in and she had ordered a large pizza. he asked her if he should cut it into eight slices or ten slices. her response- "oh, heavens! cut it into eight. i couldn't eat ten."

Are you my mother?

okay, this story happened a while ago, but it needs to be written down.

derek was at the pizza place one day, just like he is most days. derek's brother, tony, is the owner. so, this one day a lady comes in to get her pizza and pay. when derek told her the total she said "no, that's not right. i get a discount because i'm tony's mom. you know tony, the owner? i'm his mom, so i get a discount." derek just looked at this lady and said "well, i'm tony's brother..." and before he could get further she threw her money on the counter, took the pizza and ran out the door. we don't know how she knew tony's name, but it certainly was a funny thing that happened.

Delivery

hello, ruth here. on monday i was at my mother's house and derek picked up our son, andy, at school and took him back to the pizza place. our son really likes to hang out with daddy. my mom called and ordered pizza for delivery. derek told andy he was gonna deliver pizza and him to gram's house. andy said okay, but then started crying. derek asked what was wrong and andy told him he didn't want to be put into a pizza bag. derek reassured him that he wouldn't have to ride in a pizza bag. so cute.

Do I Look Single?

Ruth here-

okay, so today i went to see derek at the pizza place that he manages. when i pulled into the parking lot i could see that there were several people in the lobby. i told the kids that they needed to stay with me because daddy was too busy for them to be running around getting in the way. as we were walking in there was a man outside with a little boy. they were waiting for their order to be done. we went in and the kids were okay at first, but then they stopped listening. emmy was making the door bell go off over and over, and andy was started to go behind the counter. i told them both to come back to me, but neither one did. so, we walked out. of course they then promised that they would be good and we turned around to go back inside. well, the man with the boy had gone inside by then and was getting his order. while i was still outside this is the conversation between him and derek:

man: i feel sorry for her. single mom with two kids, and all.
derek: oh, she does all right.
man: oh, do you know her?
derek: yeah, she's my wife.

the man took his pizza and left. i don't know why he thought i was single.

i've started this blog for my husband. sometimes he has the funniest stories about the weirdo people that he has to deal with. i don't know how often i'll get him to add stories, but i'll try.